I find it interesting that my to-do list now contains topics about which I want to blog.  I have a whole slew of things to write about, but finding the time to sit and write has been a challenge to say the least.

I guess I just wanted you (my few, but faithful? readers) to know that I’m still here, I’m still thinking and hoping to post more regularly someday soon.  (Just so you know, I’m currently wrestling a rAther strong 6.5 month-old who thinks he should u5fe be the one typing!).

I do want to report, however, that Saturday evening, after his “episode” of nastiness, he proceeded to give me one of the most rewarding mommy moments yet as he snuggled up to me with his soft-fleecey pajamed frame and promptly fell fast asleep.  He was so peaceful, so sweet, and I loved that close moment.  I must have been really relaxed too because the next thing I knew, Garth was waking me up to go to bed!

I suppose it just goes to show that things change at break-neck speed when kids are involved! 

After catching up on my blog reading, I was reminded of the several topics I wanted to write about myself.  My Thursday night TV shows, my first week of cross country meets, C. scooching and squirming all around the floor, the houseguests we had this past week, and more. 

However, with the wailing from the upstairs bedroom as my soundtrack for this post, I’m prompted to wave the white flag instead.  How is it that one, so publicly serene child turns into a crazed scream-monster at home?  What happens at daycare (a much busier place than home) that results in his 2-3 hour naps as opposed to his 30-minute teasers on the weekends?  Can someone explain how a nose so small can contain so much snot? 

These are the questions that run through my mind.  This is the topic I’m chiming in on.  In so many ways I want to be the mom who has it all together.  Who approaches every situation with an innate loving grace and intuition.  So far, those plans have been foiled too.  It’s the moments like this that I doubt my ability and qualifications for this, my most important job. 

There are so many ways to second-guess myself.  By letting him cry will he grow up thinking that others may abandon him?  However, if I continue to rescue him, rock him, snuggle him into slumber, aren’t I creating a monster who won’t learn how to fall asleep on his own? 

So many questions….

As my first Best Shot Monday, I couldn’t resist this cute little shot of Calder (and Dad) helping with laundry on Saturday morning.  I love the way he’s so focused…on what I’m not certain, but focused nonetheless!